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Self-taught behaviourism


2011-06-21


Jesse Cook - Cancion Triste (Quitar).



In order to understand some people or characters’ behaviour on this virtual forum, I did some amateurish studies on behaviourism by starting to look at the literal definition of some relevant key concepts and words. These concepts may be helpful for further revealing the mind, of either those characters or the people who created them, behind their certain behavioural pattern of using spoken languages to sever their purposes.

From the Cambridge Dictionary
Behaviourism:
The theory that the study of the human mind should be based on people's actions and behaviour, and not on what they say that they think or feel.

Self-publicist:
An individual who compulsively and serially posts stories of themselves in a public forum in an effort to gain self-gratifying attention.

Egotist:
A person who considers themselves to be better or more important than other people.

Egomania:
When a person considers themselves to be very important and able to do anything that they want to do.

From www.phrases.org.uk/
There is no such thing as bad publicity
The idea that no publicity can do harm is clearly open to question. For someone seeking notoriety and a somewhat scandalous reputation, like Marie Lloyd and Mae West in days gone by, or Paris Hilton in our era, that may be true. The shareholders of BP and Toyota, which have both suffered falls in their market price due to worldwide publishing of their recent difficulties, may feel differently.

'There's no such thing as bad publicity' is often associated with Phineas T. Barnum, the 19th century American showman and circus owner. Barnum was a self-publicist of the first order and never missed an opportunity to present his wares to the public. Like many other supposed quotations, there's no hard evidence to link the 'bad publicity' quotation to him.

The proverbial expression began to be used in the early 20th century. The earliest version of it that I have found in print is from the US newspaper The Atlanta Constitution, January, 1915:

All publicity is good if it is intelligent.

The thought behind the proverb had been expressed earlier by Oscar Wilde:

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

There's no such thing as bad publicity probably the most celebrated adapter of the expression was another great wit from the Dublin literary scene, the Irish Republican and "drinker with a writing problem", Brendan Behan. Behan's boisterous lifestyle meant that for him, more than others, there was truth in his opinion that:

There's no such thing as bad publicity except your own obituary.




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内容 作者 时间 ..
40.浪侠,你不去打扫自己的房间,我就只好上这儿来问候你啦!你好吗?就算是生我的气,也别生这么久呀!上次真不是故意把你“晾着”,而是出门在外,上网不便。到现在我还没把那些帖给补看全呢!

好了好了,再怎么生气、不满,不待见我们,也还是来露一下脸吧!总让人这么牵挂,你心里也过意不去不是?
一江春水♀2011-07-26 21:47:26
39.老溜号#37,
I ain't waiting for nothing! ;-)
醋 哥♂2011-06-30 15:48:43
38.老刘
你这waiting game是“守林待鸟”还是“守株待兔”涅?:))

老侃♂2011-06-30 14:20:24
37.化石#36.
Thanks for sharing the photo of Black-necked Stilt.

老侃#35,醋哥#34.
One of the tricks to catch (photo) birds is the ‘waiting game’. Birds are strongly territorial and would like to come back to the same place again and again. This is a compulsive behaviour. Thus, all you need to do is to pick up a comfortable spot in their usual place, just like fishing, wait for the birds to turn up, and shoot when they turn up. There is no point to chase a flying bird even if you have a very long lens.

The game is over, by which I meant the time as soon as you and others on this site, like our own bird-photoing expert - 化石, are able to efficiently identify the birds even with constant coat-changing, and not the time until the birds become sensible enough no longer coming back. If, a big IF, that really happens, where is the fun of waiting, right?

老溜号♂2011-06-30 12:38:05
36.小普/#29, 才读到你又修改了大作, 还是“冲”着我的逮鸟活计。 这, 送你一只高脚东东, 谢谢关心哈。 (小声问,你的活口功课呢?)

Black-necked Stilt 它们通常是和我的那跳舞的 American Avocet (反嘴鹬)群居, 因为这些 American Avocet 不造窝, 将自己的蛋下在了 Black-necked Stilts 的窝里, 结果嘛, 长相体型也挺像, 时间一长, 混在一块了。 如微网的马甲们, 自己也搞不清此时此刻是那个角色了, (最后一句是化石评语, 嘻嘻)。

Black-necked Stilt


小资料: Male and female Black-necked Stilts trade off the job of constructing the nest. While one mate observes, the other scrapes into the dirt with breast and feet to form a depression about 2 inches deep. As they dig, they throw small bits of lining over their back into the nest. Most lining is added to the nest during incubation, and consists of whatever material is closest to the nest, including grasses, shells, mud chips, pebbles, and bones. Some nests are left unlined.
化石♀2011-06-29 20:32:54
35.醋哥
我觉得Game 早在一个月以前就应该over 了,可它不如人意呀,人家总来给送活来,你说咱能不接吗?你说昨天“看戏”这不是送上门的么,这没人惹她/他呀。所以game 是不是over, 你说对了,never say never again. 咱还真不在乎,来者不拒,绝对奉陪到底,保质保量。

老侃♂2011-06-29 05:48:41
34.老溜号, Re: So far, this game is OVER.
Do you believe that?
Never say never again :-)
醋 哥♂2011-06-28 18:25:03
33.老刘
半斤八辆, 哈哈.....
老侃♂2011-06-28 15:24:43
32.老侃,
Intellectuals' Virtual Tai Ji,IVTJ, definitely a better term, except I am only a smelly shoe-repairer, and guess what? So are you.;-)

老溜号♂2011-06-28 13:07:49
31.老刘
我很想把你的virtual intellectual Tai Ji 改成: Intellectuals' Virtual Tai Ji,这样好像更好笑一些:)
老侃♂2011-06-28 12:58:27
30.PS. on #13.

Let’s temporally try to be neutral by leaving out the moral right and wrong, which itself seems to be quite laughable. To me, what have happened here may be considered as ‘virtual intellectual Tai Ji’, just like playing Chess or Go over the internet. One may be dark in mind, but may not be necessarily a bad player in games. Having said that, from such a profound leading position on this web-forum ended up to a completely naked defeat without any reservation in a few rounds is simply down to the vital but ever-so-common mistakes in game-players: Subjectively overestimating ones’ relatively old (out of dated) and non-technical smartness and underestimating opponents’ relatively young (up to dated) intelligence and technical skills. In the end, what goes around, comes around, people who started the game inevitably got burned by their own fire.

So far, this game is OVER. Prospectively, whether there are more games coming or not largely depends on self-control of compulsiveness and willingness to deceive. Let’s wait and see.

浪迹天涯#28,
Thanks very much for your additional terms of behaviourism. Incidentally, I mentioned the word of narcissism in my photographic video [水仙花] last year, and a friend very recently happened to mention those words to me for the same reason as yours. How educational, says the least.

老溜号♂2011-06-28 11:29:58
29.浪侠,我觉得你有些误解了外科医生的意思。希望你能放一放,(过些时日,回头看是不是有那么一丁点过于以己之心,度他人之意了,像当初"度化石之意"一样)。不然对你的身体不利。

Btw,你给我带的那些"批斗高帽",让我哭笑不得。你叨叨我三句,道歉一句,骂我五句,收回一句。冲你这"火"身,"普通人"躲闪都来不及啊,岂敢靠近?!我微微笑,摇摇头,叹叹气。心里说"唉!这辈子最不走运的事就是没跟小浪步调一致!":-)

噢,对了,我被MJ伤害的事早忘了。不是贵人多忘事,是"普通人"脑容量不够大,装不了那么多,高兴的事,好事都记不住,记不过来,哪有时间空间记不愉快的事,对吧,化石?伤筋动骨不过一百天啊。化石,正好问候你,你上次的几级骨折彻底好了吧?见你活蹦乱跳地到处逮鸟欢着呐。你看"(遐)乐姐儿"就忙得没你那么悠哉乐哉!

别向我开火,别向我开炮。因为我已经被浪打趴下了。
浪身千万保重!
此贴被普通人于2011-06-27 09:20:55修改。
普通人♀2011-06-27 07:06:49
28.老溜号:
"We are all self-publicists to certain extend. That is usually how people around to know us" ... very true. Personally I consider the term of "self-publicity" neutral. In fact, it is so vital in the business (including art) & political world, one has to master the art of self-publicity or self-promotion in order to succeed. In essence, anybody with a public face would need it. As such, all your quotes here make sense to me, e.g., All publicity is good if it is intelligent :-)

However in this close-knit social network, most of us are here to make friends & share some fun time together. We have no interest in selling & buying. To see the acting of the "extreme self-publicist & liar" done under the name of "truth, goodness & beauty " is mind boggling, especially to those of us who still truly value and believe in these things.

The following seems to describe a big part of the concerned behaviour, what you think?

narcissist:
A narcissist spends all of his time acting, protecting his ego by presenting to the world a mask, a false image of himself. Consequently he becomes a master of deceit.

A narcissist is someone who is overtly or subtly arrogant, exhibitionistic, vain, manipulative, and greedy for admiration.

NPD (narcissist personality disorder):

Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration. Those with narcissistic personality disorder believe that they're superior to others and have little regard for other people's feelings. But behind this mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem, vulnerable to the slightest criticism.
浪迹天涯♀2011-06-24 23:09:05
27.外科医生/26
"自省能力, Love, 敬畏...", are all nice words, but since “鸡鸭不共语”, they can mean nothing to some. When the basic concept of "truth, goodness, beauty" can be redefined to mean "phony, evil, ugly", the world will be upside down & become an unpleasant place to live in for many of us, as all things we used to know would suddenly lose meaning.

BTW, I'm often at a loss when I see the word “敌人” in a serious discussion. What does it mean really? To me it's an emotional word & brings more confusion than anything else, as in our generation, this word equals to "class enemies", or those with different opinions from your own & you were taught to believe that they had no right to exist on the earth and should be destroyed completely. However, in other part of the world where most of us are now living in, people are not only entitled, but also encouraged to have different opinions & beliefs and they (so called “敌人” in our culture) have no problem living & working together friendly as long as they have respect for one another.

But if someone is dishonest, self-centered and showing little respect for others, then they may find it difficult to get alone with most people from anywhere in the world- anywhere perhaps except for China. Lying & cheating are universally despicable, although it is perfectly OK to some of our own folks...
浪迹天涯♀2011-06-24 22:52:16
26.behavioral patterns指缺乏自律(self- regulation)的所有行为。人拥有一点自省能力,有益无害,与"心理医生"无关。

Love的含义不仅在于"爱心"。Love是最难定义的一个词,在这个词面前,我有一种难以言表的感激和敬畏。人有所敬畏是件好事。

微网没有敌人,然而有鸡鸭,鸡鸭不共语。散沙状态何尝不好。

谢谢化石,祝所有的鸡鸭周末愉快!
外科医生♂2011-06-24 13:23:15
25.化石, My kind of bird!!
Oh, not you, the American Avocet ;-)

老溜号♂2011-06-24 12:52:23
24.化MM, wow, dancing so elegantly & beautifully... have a nice weekend!
此贴被浪迹天涯于2011-06-24 12:48:02修改。
浪迹天涯♀2011-06-24 12:47:11
23.'Listen to the music and dance.'

American Avocet


FYI: With its elegant profile and striking coloration, the American Avocet is unique among North American birds.

•American Avocet chicks leave the nest within 24 hours after hatching. Day-old avocets can walk, swim, and even dive to escape predators.

----

So we? Have a nice weekend.
化石♀2011-06-24 12:34:56
22.老侃/17
b. 继续辨别是非对错,更多人受到伤害,旷日持久,最后微坛彻底垮塌;
What? Are you saying none of us here has the ability to deal with or discuss whatever issues we deem interesting as an adult without getting too emotional? :-)

外科医生/15,
"but LOVE may offer some relief to the problem. "

I agree with 老溜号/18 that you are making assumptions here without any in person diagnosis & thus any treatment you offer can be faulty.

I also believe that part of being an adult is taking responsibilities for one's own action & its consequences. We all go through a lot in life & no one should ask for special treatment for his/her bad behaviour. For those who haven't learned to take responsbilities and show no respect for anyone else other than themselves, there is no amount of love, no amount of sympathy, no amount of kindness, no amount of forgiveness... nothing that could possibly stop their bad behaviour except for the orders from a court- that's what the law and prisons are made for. :-)
此贴被浪迹天涯于2011-06-24 12:44:46修改。
浪迹天涯♀2011-06-24 12:29:16
21.The best phrase for y'all (老溜号老侃外科医生职业看客浪迹天涯毕静) - 难得不糊涂
俺是真糊涂,所以俺也很“难得”, forgive me for the shameless self promoting.
醋 哥♂2011-06-24 12:16:13
20.老溜号#13, well said (echo 老侃#14你Y啥时候练就一手好洋字码涅? I guess the answer is Brits know how to talk.)
Talking about folks being self-centered, I think lack of self-confidence plays a role too. Think for our own experiences, when do people need to try this hard to promote themselves? And in front of whom in that sense?
Also our own "surgeon general" said that most psychological problems are related to the deficit of love or faulty "love" in childhood, I guess deficit of confidence contributes to one's mental (un)health as well.
醋 哥♂2011-06-24 12:08:38
19."最低地”和“是和用心”是啥意思呀?
“最低的”, “是何用心”
老侃/老看,你们哥俩是真没看懂还是拿俺开涮?
醋 哥♂2011-06-24 11:52:15
18.Continued from #13. Just a short closing remarks on the topic of behaviourism: ‘Truth is out there.’ Truth-searching has been my life-long passion, but truth usually hurts. Can I handle the truth and not being hurt by it? I am not sure. What I can only do is trying my best to be truthful to myself and my friends. Meanwhile, I appreciate “难得糊涂” - 老侃#17, but being muddled is certainly very hard to bear at the time and very hard to overcome afterwards.

外科医生#15.Hope you had a good rest when you read this.

I appreciate your endless efforts to help and repeatedly showing your deep sympathy and LOVE. For sure, you are not alone among the many on this site. Just remind you that incorrect assumptions leads to misdiagnosis, let alone the appropriate treatments. This, I am sure, you would have known better than me.

Thanks again for the comments, and have a good weekend, everyone. 'Listen to the music and dance.'

老溜号♂2011-06-24 11:19:24
17.大夫
谈谈我对你提的这几个问题的个人看法:

1.How were certain behavioral patterns formed?
这里没有心理学家,大家不过聚在这里社交而已,如果把这里发生的问题联系到心理问题上或者行为问题,可能是一个旷日持久讨论,而且专业的指导必不可少,依我的看法,即便有自愿服务的“专业心理医师”,也需要证明其真实性和自身专业的credibility,不是说”我是心理医生”,别人就认账了,这在网上几乎不可能。

2. Why we are what we are?
???

3. Solutions to the problems?
可能有几种:
a. 从此大家不再提此事,慢慢自然消化,然后回归原本的状态,散沙也是美丽的,喜欢用马甲的人在自己屋里随便用,不在乎和马甲交朋友的,也请便;

b. 继续辨别是非对错,更多人受到伤害,旷日持久,最后微坛彻底垮塌;

c. 所谓以“爱心”医治创伤,就更是一个未知数,
首先你得证明心理创伤确实存在,在这期间反派会出来证实这个问题不存在,两派辩论输赢难料,要想让微坛这么多人都信服一个理论,非一日之功。

最后,我认为,此事越理论,越理论不清,而且理论越多越久,越多无辜的人会受到伤害。目前,这坛子里还是有人不理解两点:1.大家都不是白痴,2. 背后交易不可能解决任何问题,只能让问题恶化,有话拿到桌面上来说。

我建议,大家就此停手,用国人不怎么样的方法解决不怎么样的事情 - "难得糊涂”。

老侃♂2011-06-24 09:48:32
16.外科医生#15.
Hello, back from the Motherland yet? Have a rest first, no rush. I will reply to you when you have had a good sleep. Night, night, sleep tight.


老溜号♂2011-06-24 08:11:40
15.I consider self-regulation on this website has been very poor.

How were certain behavioral patterns formed? Why we are what we are? Solutions to the problems? These questions interest me more than the described phenomena.

Most psychological problems are related to the deficit of love or faulty "love" in childhood. Children who experienced DNA (Deprivation, Neglect, Abuse) are very likely to develop erratic behavior. No one can wind back the clock and undo the damage done in childhood, but LOVE may offer some relief to the problem.
外科医生♂2011-06-24 07:15:20
14.老刘
《A Sock-Puppet Commercial for MaC》 太好笑了,“醋哥” 绝对不用“毕静”帮忙就能消化下去,哈哈...

btw, #13 好文 (你Y啥时候练就一手好洋字码涅?)

老侃♂2011-06-24 07:08:14
13.Hello chaps, thanks for coming.

Since I have got audience, I will say a few more words about what and why has happened on this website? IMHO, I think retrospectively that the whole ‘tornado’ thing started by ‘a self-publicist in extreme + compulsive liar’ and his associates. These people are opportunists who are constantly seeking the chance to make themselves to stand out. If that is impossible in real life due to lacking essential skills or simply luck, then why not try it by reborn themselves in a virtual world. All the dirty laundries and nasty baggage in the past of real life can be either covered up or converted into something pretending ‘truthful-kind-pretty’. Besides, this web-site is full of native-Chinese hard-living in all corners of this planet. Most of them come to the site in their spare time to entertain, to dream or to watch night-sky. This website is also at its infancy. It has not clearly established either moral standard or technical restrictions on people’s actions, but relies on people’s self-regulation. This allows a couple of self-centred people to have more freedom to manipulate others using deception on who they really are and who they want others to think they are? By hijacking a relaxing and culture-rich forum and its audience here, they may turn it as their base and an ideal lunching platform for going into a bigger market. Meanwhile, although this forum is a ‘free world’, people’s words and acts have a clear moral dimension. Other people who have enjoyed the same forum and companion of each other on an equal term started to passionately and openly demonstrate their opposition to the extreme self-publicising and lying behaviour based on their own moral ground.

Now, please take a time-out/tea-break, and come back later for more.

醋哥#7, this insertion is for you.
《A Sock-Puppet Commercial for MaC》



老溜号♂2011-06-24 06:12:00
12.看客
“最低地”和“是和用心”是啥意思呀? 哈哈....
老侃♂2011-06-24 05:47:45
11.醋哥(4):在这高手如云的微网俺可是文化最低地,您让俺翻译是和用心?
醋哥,咋地,你也是俺们扫盲班儿毕业的呀?!醋哥,“最低地”和“是和用心”是啥意思呀?醋哥,你是不怕酸东西滴,right? 哈哈哈。
职业看客♂2011-06-24 01:17:35
10.I see, 你把俺家大老板也给加上了,看看她晚上回来有何反应。醋 哥♂2011-06-23 18:24:12
9.2:2 !毕静♀2011-06-23 18:20:35
8.毕静,老侃,您二位联合起来对付俺,没这么玩儿的啊!醋 哥♂2011-06-23 18:17:42
7.All publicity is good if it is intelligent - I guess "to the right audience" is part of being intelligent, otherwise s/he will end up either wasting her/his time or insulting the audience or both.
Also about boastful - IMO bragging/showing off may work but boasting will not, because boasting is lying.
醋 哥♂2011-06-23 18:13:23
6.老侃,
反正不是醋哥就是酷嫂,谁都成,对吧?
毕静♀2011-06-23 17:56:48
5.老刘,浪醋
很欣赏你们两个的对话,学习了。

醋哥
你就别谦虚了吧。
老侃♂2011-06-23 17:16:00
4.毕静#1, 您老人家是想要我出洋相啊!在这高手如云的微网俺可是文化最低地,您让俺翻译是和用心?:-(醋 哥♂2011-06-23 13:16:09
3.浪迹天涯#2,thanks for your comments, and I agree with your added interpretation. Please allow me to clarify a few things further following your line.

"Self publicity" here generally describes acts in a boastful, self-promoting manner, in other words, the behaviour of so-called ‘blowing your own trumpet’. A self-publicist is simply someone who does a lot of self-publicising.

We are all self-publicists to certain extend. That is usually how people around to know us. You would not like to talk to someone who would never talk about oneself or to express one’s opnion. However, a self-publicist in extreme is someone (a real person in life or a character created for a virtual world) can be described as someone who mixes up facts, fictions and fantasies in order to establish a 'respectable' person/character in a specific way by misleading the audiences/readers. This kind of behaviour is usually deliberated, compulsive and very deceptive, which surely is the results of one’s mind-working.

Furthermore, lies will be sooner or later uncovered, and lying bares serious consequences. Everybody knows that including liar. Why lying then? Because, at the time, that a liar always thinks s/he can get away with it or cover it up with more new lies. Lying in most of cases could also be compulsive. What you said below is then ‘a self-publicist in extreme + a compulsive liar’. This peculiar mind-driven behavioural pattern, like someone’s signature, is not difficult to be recognised over time despite the deliberated cover-up.

老溜号♂2011-06-23 07:07:14
2.I suppose "self publicity" or "publicy" you mentioned here is meant to be a way of self selling - through one's real life experiences & stories. There should be differences between a self-publicist and someone who compulsively lies and makes up all kinds of stories about who s/he is.浪迹天涯♀2011-06-22 21:45:22
1.好艰涩难懂嘛!

哪位高手给翻一下?醋哥?
毕静♀2011-06-21 17:15:40